Matrimonials

It's like personals, but for people looking for arranged marriages.

I could read these all day.

Let's look at just one example. This is the first one I see, copied right out of today's Times of India (weird spellings and capitalization included):

Very affluent, Politically and Socially Well-Connected Elite Jain Family of repute having major presence in Stocks, Real Estate Finance, Power and Internationally acclaimed Television Channel. Seeks suitable alliance for Their Very Smart & Exceptionally Beautiful Multifaceted Vivacious Daughter.

26/5' 4.5" Investment Management (Cass Business School-UK) B.Sc. -Finance from Renowned Institute of USA, Finishing School- Switzerland. Widely Traveled Manging of the the Flourishing Family Business.

We wish to hear from a Tall, Very Handsome, Dynamic, Professionally Qualified (Premier Institutes) boy hailing from a distinguished Jain/Vaish Industrial House or high profile business family. Reply with Bio-date and recent photo to....

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Some request that a caste identification is sent along with the photo, some specify dowry terms, a majority request a particular religion or sect, and all refer to the marriage as an 'alliance.'

I wonder what they would do if I responded...